Alternate realities

This is a blog idea I had a while ago, that I figured would be much much too long to write about given a reasonable amount of time that I would like to spend doing so. In any case, I just had the though, that what if I had made entirely different choices in my life, mainly since coming to college. I could have a much better, or possible even a worse life than I do right now. This can be very long, so I will just take it to a point. In any case, it boils down to this: if one day I had chosen to do something important, rather than putting it off for a while or not doing it at all (especially not doing it at all) where would I be right now? As far back as I would like to go that would have a drastic impact on the present would be the following: If I had actually joined the track team or other such thing in high school, as my mother suggested, as well as joining clubs and being more social, I would most certainly not be going to this same school. That one fact of me going to a different college than I had, would not only change how my life is, is to be, and was for the past few years, but would also change who I am as a person, who I am to be, and the things that I have experienced over the years. This is all very depressing, and knowing I can't do anything about the choices I've made now leads me to wonder how much time there really is left until I can fix a lot of things. Even knowing that, why can't I find the motivation to do anything that my life doesn't absolutely depend on?

Nothing is random

This both goes in line with what I had said before, and in a way, contradicts it. Just a short little snippet about a word I really don't like: Random. There is absolutely no such thing as anything being random. There is always cause and effect, and even programs that generate random numbers do so by have a function, that if you know what the function is, you then know what number comes next. In any case, it is a word people use much too often to describe something that either surprised them or seemed to come from a large list of possibilities. Either way, anything that happens, happens because something else happened. In other words, when you do something, it causes something else to happen, a thing which, down the road, might surprise someone. Oh well, it's not random though. One extreme example I can think of right now, is where you take hundreds of peoples names, written around all equally-sized and weighted marbles, stick them in a bag, and pick one out. Though you may not know which name will be pulled out, every little bit of movement each marble makes within the bag is a map to where the marbles have ended up when you decide to stick your hang in and grab one. A typical example is with the flipping of a coin, say a penny. The placement of the penny on your finger, the exact motion that your fingers go through and the amount of force given to the penny, as well as other factors, including air resistance and such, will determine how the penny lands in your palm. It is not random, but is also not something we can figure out during the time penny is in the air. This has gone on much too long, just please stop thinking so many things are random. It just tells me how uneducated you are, or at least, how much you have actually learned in life.

My stupid ankle

Well, after going to the gymnastics gym several times and doing a bit of inside training at home, I figured my ankle was finally ready to try outside again. BAD idea. To cut to the point, it is quite sore again, and this is not from doing anything stupid, or a new injury, really. I just landed, and on grass, even. Anyway, it's got a new swelling, under the bone. I should really get it looked at. Perhaps I'll set up an appointment for some day during spring break.

Just a couple days left

Well, the blog assignment for class is due on Monday. I haven't written a whole lot, and I feel really bad about it. I'm sure there are others in class that have also been pretty lazy about the whole thing. Me, I just felt really tied down to projects, exams, readings, and other such things. Even now, I'm fretting over a little group final in this same class. I mean I have come up with things I could write about and am a slight bit excited to write about, even, but I just don't see the point right now in sharing anything I have to say with people who don't care to listen. Anyway, I will most likely somewhat regularly post new things on her, perhaps even things other than words. I could post a bunch of video clips or images from around the web and write my opinion about it. I've been told I would make a great critic - of movies, video games, and other media. Back to school, though....
This quarter has been a lot tougher than the past few. I've managed to get on the dean's list a few times in the last year or two, which is great for me. I don't see that happening this quarter. I still am pretty sure I've got at least all B's, which is okay. I also am pretty sure next quarter, which also happens to be my last, will be even tougher. I have heard a lot about a couple of the classes, and it sounds like an incredible amount of work. I'd rather take a few difficult tests than do any homework or projects. Those sorts of things don't actually help me to learn much of anything. Oh well, I will soon be done and hopefully find myself actually doing something soon.